Recap...

I pick up a brand new bouncing baby boy from the hospital, 2 days old, because he has no one who is capable of caring for him.  I take him home, care for him morning, noon and night, fall in love, prepare myself and my family mentally and emotionally for him to leave our home forever at least 2 different times.  We celebrate his 1^st birthday after watching him to learn to rollover, laugh, eat big people food and crawl. (Not necessarily in that order.) Then, we help him learn to stand, balance, walk and run, all the while kissing his boo boos and loving him even more.  We are just shy of 18 months of pure love for our son! Now it’s almost time to send him away forever. For real this time. Well, maybe. Could we hang on for another 6 months? Oh wait -- unpack.  It might be another 18 months...  

I Love Visit Time!

NOT!  When not on spring break we wake up at 7am and take the kids to school starting with Abby at 740 and then Ethan at 8am. We get home at 810 to 820 depending on the traffic. We sit down for breakfast and since “Little Man” is a super vacuum, we leave the kitchen about 15mins later.  Straight to the living room for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and some email checking.  At 9am we head upstairs so I can get ready while “Little Man” hangs out in his crib and watches a bit more Mickey Mouse.  For this to happen without a hitch, I have to immediately open up the drapes before I put him in his crib.  If not, the thought of a possible bed time for “Little Man” produces a scream for all to hear.

We must leave the house at 9:30am for us to get to the visit on time.  I decided just recently to have the visits at the Child Welfare office.  They have rooms for us to use for this purpose.  I feel like having the visits at the park as they were previously isn’t realistic for BioMom.  “Little Man” loves being outside and running around.  He could do it all day, rain or shine. Perfect right? On top of that, I am there for him to feel comfortable.  I’m also there for BioMom to walk up to whenever she wants to and chat.  This makes her more comfortable.  It’s not real life. Real life is being stuck in a one room apartment, an office appt and having to deal with a toddler who wants to touch everything and be loud.  That is perfect! So, as soon as we get to the office, BioMom is usually sitting right inside the door. “Little Man” is always glad to see her and walks over to her with no hesitation. We then go to the visit room which is filled with toys and books and a table and chairs.  BioMom and “Little Man” walk through the door and I say my goodbyes adding any important updates that may affect her visit. Sometimes, he is super tired or super cranky. She closes the door and the fun begins.  “Little Man” begins his vocal exercises crying and screaming. The past few visits it hasn’t lasted long.  (insert smarty pants comment about Biomom – I forgot what I was going to say after taking a break from writing.) Serious note, BioMom is getting more at ease with him as he is getting used to being with her.  Gosh I hate saying that at this point. It is what I should be hoping for but lately I am finding myself wishing for a fall!

What is that?

I’ve been reading a blog lately that is actually not current but it started back in 2005. I’m in 2006 and hooked as ever.  It is written by a Foster Dad and it’s titled “Other Peoples Kids”. www.thefosterdad.blogspot.com  I love it! Wish I had thought of it first! Anyway this guy is a great writer and has an amazing insight into the foster world having been a foster brother for most of his life.  His Mom was a foster mom for 30 years.  So not only do we get his perspective on being a new foster dad but he adds his Moms opinions and experiences too. LOVE IT! I hope he starts again or wrote a book or something so when I get to the end of his blog I can continue.  Anyways my point of telling you this is he has a few genius items he includes in his blog which I am going to borrow/copy/ steal. Hope he doesn’t mind. The first one I am implementing to help you all along in my story is a list of terminology I use.  During our Foster Momma support group we sometimes stop and laugh at the conversation we just had.  We can't imagine what the flies on the walls must be thinking.

As you read, please don't hesitate to as me questions if you have them. I welcome any comments too. Fostering is important and it needs to be talked about more. I  would love to be one who starts that conversation for you.