My Family Moments: The New Year = New Questions or the Same Ol' Schtuff

Friday, January 24, 2014

The New Year = New Questions or the Same Ol' Schtuff

A blog, www.momoffmeth.com , I love to follow for many different reasons, some more obvious than others, told me she heard someone say that "some years are full of questions, and some years are full of answers." For her she said, "This year was full of accepting that I don't always have the answers to the questions, and having the ability to live with that, is where it's at." DING DING DING!! That's it. That is what I want my year to be about. I want to learn to accept not having all the answers. Being a Foster Momma has definitely put me in that reality. With a big LEGALLY in front of not being able to know any most of the answers. MomOffMeth had a list of questions... these were some that stuck out to me...

Why is it we stay in touch with certain people, and let others go, even when there isn't a clear reason?

Why do we have to work so hard to let go of stuff that is bad for us?

Why do I constantly compare my life, including my joys and pains, to other people's?

Why don't we always see people the way they should be seen?

Why don't people always see us the way we really are?

Why is it so hard to let go of the past, even when we know it is only now that counts?

Why is it so hard to decide what to wear each day?

Why is being a parent so hard?

Why can't we fix people?

Why is it so hard to accept our choices and let the "what if's" go to hell?

Why are some days so perfect, but still feel icky?

Why am I forever tired but can't seem to check anything off my To-Do List?

I have lots of waiting and thinking time being a Foster Momma. Especially with all the driving for visits I have had to do over the last 14 months. (technically 13 months) Trying to find the answers myself doesn't always work out. Sometimes it just adds more questions. I hate it when that happens. Now what do I do with this epiphany? See?? Another freakin' question!

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"Foster Family" Terminology

SW: Social Worker = This is a professionally trained (at times I feel from a YouTube video) individual who works for any County or private organization. My foster baby will have a SW and I will have a SW who is also known as a CCW. (see below)

CCW: Clinical Case Worker = This is a professionally trained individual, also known as a Social Worker who works for Angel’s Foster Family Network. They are assigned to a maximum of 12 families at one time and lead them through the fostering system. They are our right hand gal. (no males as of yet) This person does all the legal pushing and pulling on our behalf so we can focus solely on loving and caring for our foster babies. I would not and will not ever do my job as a foster mom without these people.

Supervised Visit = The bioparent has rights to see their child no matter the circumstances. Most often the visits begin as 1 to 2 hours, 1 to 2 times a week. An adult that is approved must watch the parent with the child at all times. (sometimes a lot of work and sometimes boring as heck)

Unsupervised Visit = The bioparent has rights to see their child no matter the circumstances before. If they are improving their situation then they will eventually get the right to have visits without supervision. The foster parent must drop off the child at an approved location and pick them up later. Most often the visit is for 2-6 hours 1 to 2 times a week. And these will only increase in length as the situation improves. (super hard for the foster parent to move to this step)

Foster Baby/Child = A child that has been removed from their biological family due to many different reasons affecting the welfare of the child. They are then placed in protective custody under the County and State.